Yourself Transformation
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FORGIVING YOURSELF
Have you forgiving yourself? Are you in Pain? Can you cry at the drop of a hat? Do people walking down the street holding hands make you green with envy? Does the sight of your Ex’s new girlfriend or wife make your heart race and you just have to get out of the room? Do you feel guilty? Does some part of you still feel like you did this and you are supposed to be punished for this and you are just supposed to be unhappy as your punishment?
"NO- NO- NO"
If you are any of these, you are in the right place. It is time to take a major step towards your future happiness!!
If you are any of these, you are in the right place. It is time to take a major step towards your future happiness!!
The following is an interview with Jessica Bram, the author of Happily Ever After Divorce: Notes of a Joyful Journey
. This book is wonderful. Don't miss out on your copy of it today.
Click for interview with Jessica Bram
. This book is wonderful. Don't miss out on your copy of it today. Click for interview with Jessica Bram
 Author: Brittany Watkins Price: 79.99 |
You need to forgive yourself. You need to let go of the past. Life is not fair, but you dragging it with you for months or years will not ever allow you to be truly Happy again. God forgave you, now you need to forgive you. There are many books to help you through this time use them. One of them is Move from Grief to Joy she is great at having you look inside you and showing you how to get past the grief. Look at it like this, If your child did something wrong, you get mad at them they get in trouble, and that is it. You don’t drag it up again; you forgive them and forget about it. So if you are struggling with this issue please go to Forgiveness Is a Choice: A Step-By-Step Process for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope (Apa Lifetools)
and read this book. It just could be the best investment you ever make.
POST DIVORCE MAKE-OVER
You know, you can’t continue like you are. Life has to change; it is time for a make-over.
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**First thing I want you to do is go to your bathroom take out your favorite lipstick and write on your mirror, “I Love Me!” I know it sounds weird, but you have to start believing in Love again, and it needs to start with you.
**Now stand there, look yourself right in the eyes and tell yourself, “I Love you”
**Now smile like the day you did the first time you remember being in love. Do you feel your face tighten, can you see your eyes sparkle. That is the real you.
The book 6 Week Extreme Makeover is wonderful expanding on this, we all lose sight of who we are at some point in our lives and has some easy tips to help bring the real you back. What is the one thing you hate about yourself the most? Is it something you can change? If it is, then get busy working on it. If you want a new hair cut, go for it. If you always wanted to run a marathon, get training, it takes a good 6 months. If you want to change you appearance, find the best doctor around and do it. Now is the time in your life to take care of you. And if you are having trouble just getting through the day, start small. Go for a walk in the park; go to your favorite restaurant. Call up your girlfriend and tell her you need to get out. But once you start, each day will get a little easier. And before long you will be taking that walk in the park and just smiling at all those who pass, and you know, most of them will smile back. The book 101 Things to Do the First Year of Your Divorce
has many more tips to try and get you started on your journey.
has many more tips to try and get you started on your journey.
Taking Ownership
Many people want to blame the other partner in the divorce, but you need to examine yourself very carefully. Happiness will only come after you address and figure out the way you got to where you are today. People end up in very dysfunctional relationships, ranging from alcoholism, drug addictions, infidelity, workaholics, to lost love. But each of these dysfunctions needs to be addressed. And you need to understand that just because the person who had the problem, may now be your Ex, does not make issue just go away.
Many of those dysfunctions have long ranging implications. And you must understand that those issues you have lived with all those years, have scared you. Even if you are not the person with the illness, they have shaped who you are today. There are many different groups that have been set up to help people learn to cope with these issues.
Happiness and your ability to take control of your life and admit to your short comings is in direct correlation. So if you know or ever even thought you might be living with or have one of these dysfunction, you must, seek the appropriate help. Please don’t be afraid of looking for help. If you are serious about ever being truly happy, you must address these issues and be honest with yourself.
Many of those dysfunctions have long ranging implications. And you must understand that those issues you have lived with all those years, have scared you. Even if you are not the person with the illness, they have shaped who you are today. There are many different groups that have been set up to help people learn to cope with these issues. Happiness and your ability to take control of your life and admit to your short comings is in direct correlation. So if you know or ever even thought you might be living with or have one of these dysfunction, you must, seek the appropriate help. Please don’t be afraid of looking for help. If you are serious about ever being truly happy, you must address these issues and be honest with yourself.
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If you do not address the past, the chances of you finding true happiness is very limited. Most second marriages fail at a greater rate than first marriages. And the likely hood of you falling for the same type of partner the second time is very high. And why is this? You are comfortable with that type of life, even as crazy and as much as you hated it. It is all you know. It is like you are brainwashed. You have to deprogram yourself to all your pasts. This process will give you the freedom from the divorce to the happiness you deserve.
UNDERSTANDING THE PLAN
This was the hardest thing for me to understand, who in there right mind would have a plan for me with so much pain, and tears, and loneliness. Why did I have to go through this? It took me several years and I think I am still figuring this out. God has a plan for me and you, but we have to realize his plan and our plan are not always the same plan. He has a reason for everything he is leading us to. Can we see it? No, not unless we are open to looking at what he has planned for us. He will not give us more than we can handle. He does however put people in our path that can help us, but we have to realize why those people are there. It is our responsibility to see what those people can do for us.
Don’t you wonder why the person in the park you just met the other day smiled at you? Or why did they guy at work, out of the blue, start talking to you. You have worked with him for years and he has never said ten words to me before. Well maybe, just maybe he is part of your plan. I know it is a wild concept to understand, but step back and look at your life as a whole. It looks different; people come and go in our lives. Some show up and stay, others are there for just a short time, but they all have a reason for being there. Can we see the reason? Not unless we are open to the idea that God has a plan for us. The book Set Free to Remarry will show you God understands and he is not going to condem you anymore. God is a loving god, full of Grace and peace. He wants his children to all be happy; however some of our journeys are longer and harder than others. But if we use what he is putting in front of us, maybe the journey will get a little easier.
A friend of mine told me, on one of those not so good days,
“Happiness is greater than anything you can ever remember”
“Happiness is greater than anything you can ever remember”
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